The Seatbelt Challenge

A few weeks ago, we got a hole in our tire. The tires barely had the legal tread amount but we were hoping to make it one last season on it. However the tire(s) couldn't be saved so we had to swallow the $520 bill we weren't quite ready for. I told my husband, "I choose to look at this like a blessing. Maybe something would've happened on my trip in July that replacing them will have saved us from the would be heartache or accident." 

Little did I know, I ended up being right. This last Wednesday, as I merged onto the highway headed south, a mustang with the paperwork proclaiming it was a recent purchase got into the left lane so I could pull into the right lane. A half mile down the road, I was nearly even with him in our own respective lanes when he suddenly veared into our lane. I swerved the car to the right just missing slamming into his backseat by the most narrow of increments. I remember swerving, slamming on the breaks and hearing a scream from the backseat.  By the time I came to a complete stop I was almost  turned facing west. My 8 year old daughter behind my seat had screamed in the narrowly missed accident because she was ejected from her booster seat. 

Now before you start victim blaming, know I always visually check to make sure they're buckled in. We are big on car seat safety. So when my daughter buckled in, the clip must not have been fully engaged which led to her being ejected. Stopping from a terrifying 60 mph, I know very well what could have happened. So, I've already implemented some things so this never happens to us again. Like I told my kids, you never know when an accident will happen, so we always need to make sure you're buckled in correctly every time you get in a car.

So here's the challenge and after you complete the challenge, challenge your friends with the hashtag 

#seatbeltchallenge 

The next time you get into the car with your kids take a few extra minutes to go over seat belt safety. It doesn't matter whether they're 5 or 15 years old. We should be going over the basics every 6 months as a reminder. People always get sloppy with the things we do over and over and all the time. 

 Explain and constantly quiz them on what I'm calling the 3-point seatbelt safety. 

1. 

The seatbelt should rest against the hips in case of impact.

2.

Have them pull up on the seat belt after it is buckled in. This assures that the buckle has engaged properly. 

3.

The seatbelt lays across the chest and up across the shoulder.

As part of the challenge, put a reminder where you will see it. I'm later going to put a label on my dashboard so for now, I hung a tag from my rear view mirror. 

Thank you for taking the time to read and hopefully this challenge will be as good for your family as it was mine! After all, we haul around the most precious cargo!

How to Help and be Helped During a Race

How to Help and be Helped During a Race

I have ran one marathon, a lot of half marathons and tons of shorter races. I really love the race experience. I love training and working hard because I keep striving to get that elusive PR. There are races that keep popping up all over the place. I want to tell about my good experience and bad experiences to hopefully pass a long to race directors so they get some feedback. As well, I want to pass along some advice to fellow runners so they may have a better experience. 

Let’s talk about registration: Registration fees have shot up in the last few years. It used to be pretty common to be able to run a marathon (or half) for under $70. Now it seems the average cost is between $100-$130. I don’t mind paying the $115 most cost as long as I’m paying for good amenities and a good course. What really makes my blood boil is that a lot of races are sending out emails within the week after the race has completed asking people to sign up for the following year and the incentive to do so? Every 3 months registration costs will continue to go up. I really do understand that the race directors do this to get people to sign up early. However, I feel it’s a bit too much for the participants. A price increase should not happen earlier than 6 months from race day and late registration should be 60 days prior to race day. Let me finish paying for the first marathon before I have to sign up for next year. This is doubly important for fall races because then you have the holidays right around the corner after you finish the race. Participants shouldn’t have to choose between paying for a race or putting money towards the holiday festivities. I also feel that if spouses are doing a race together and sign up together, maybe a little discount would help ease the cost burden. 

Packet Pick-up: I don’t think we’ve really had a purposefully bad experience. We showed up at our last race to pick up packets and somehow my registration wasn’t there. We were able to get help quickly and straighten it out.  Packet pick-up can equally be just as an important of an affair for some racers as the race itself. It’s nice to have booths that runners can walk around and pick things that may help them along the way. One of my favorite things I’ve seen at packet pick up was at the Boston Marathon. They had a video that showed the course from a biker’s perspective that people could sit down and watch. The video had interviews on it from runners giving course advice or telling their stories. This is great for first timers or out of towners. 

Race Day: For me, I appreciate an early start time for most races. 7:00am seems to be the best time. The later it gets for the warmer month races, the hotter the start time is. When I line up behind the start line, I really like seeing pace markers. That way it encourages people to start where they should be. Nothing is worse than starting where you should and still have to end up weaving around groups of walkers or people that are running twice as slow as you. Walkers, PLEASE START IN THE BACK. We don’t like having to expend extra energy trying to get around you.   Most courses are chip timed now so you’re not getting ahead in any way. For this reason also, I hate out and back courses. My husband, a marathoner, hates having to weave around half marathoners. One race that I did had an out and back course for the full marathoners and shuttled the half marathoners to the marathon halfway point. They had an excellent plan of starting the full marathoners 2 hours before the half marathon so when they dropped off the half marathoners, almost all the full marathoners had already been through the half-way point. 

My biggest pet peeve is chaos at water stations. Most are run by volunteers and not properly given instructions. I really appreciate the volunteers. They are our support team. However, if you choose to volunteer, please realize all my energy is spent on running. I need the volunteer to do some simple things to keep the water stations a pleasant experience. Please don’t set up a water station on the furthest curve of the road. If I have to go several more steps to get to you, I’ll probably just skip the water. Every step and second counts; I don’t want to waste them if I don’t have to. Also, I need volunteers to shout what they have. If I think I grabbed water only to throw back a sports drink, I’m going to be pretty shocked. Most people have preferences to what they want and when we’re running and seeing a volunteer just holding out a cup to us, we have no idea what we’re getting unless you tell us. Runners- when you approach a water station and want to walk, please get your drink and move QUICKLY to the side. A person that wants to chug while running should not have to come to an almost complete stop behind you. Also, to ease the process, every person that uses an aid station should point to whoever they would like to receive a drink from. This eliminates a lot of fumbling and confusion for the volunteers. Also, I really appreciate the workers that know the sign language “water”. I admit it, I’m too exhausted to speak during the second half of a race. If I hold up a W shape with my fingers in front of my mouth, this means “water”. Or if I hold up 2 fingers right before I get to you, that means I need two cups. 

Post race: I really appreciate races that have a good variety of food post race. Candies, fruit, soup, marinated meat on a stick. Wow, some races go all out. It makes me love you that much more. I feel like the amenities make a race go from good to amazing. I really like the races that make the finish line chute a memorable experience. Free post race photos are a neat perk that I’ve seen at some races. 

Other: One thing stands out for me that I remembered from the Washington Newport Marathon this year. They had free childcare in a theatre. I didn’t know they had that until I got there to pick up my packet. If I would’ve known about that, I would have signed up my husband too. However, he wasn’t signed up because he watched the kids so I could run. I was thoroughly impressed with the idea of the childcare though. 

Also, never forget to fill out your personal and medical information on the back of your bib. You never know what’s going to happen in a race. You want to be prepared. 

If you have anything you would like to add, please let me know in the comment section. Thank you to all the people that put on races! 

Whipped Sherbert Punch

I discovered this drink on my 29th birthday. It is a tasty, fruity drink. You may be familiar with the virgin version, but the alcohol version is an enhanced flavor. 

DIRECTIONS:

Mix in a glass 

Equal parts 7up and Hawaiin Fruit Pumch

1 shot Whipped Vodka (I've used Burnetts and Pinnacle) 

1 scoop of rainbow sherbert

Do You Utilize One of the Best Parenting Tools

Dear Parents, 

Do you utilize one of the most useful tools you have? You already possess it and you probably under-utilize it. Natural consequences. 

Natural consequences are such a powerful parenting tool. It teaches kids real life lessons. Now, I'm not saying let your toddler play with a knife and see how it goes. I'm saying if your 4 year old is refusing to put on a coat on a balmy 34 degree day because it's sunny and refuses to listen to your stance, let him/her go out without the coat. The child will quickly realize that maybe mom or dad had a point and be back for the coat. 

My daughter forgot to take her snowsuit one day to school after I told her to pack it that morning. The school called me and asked me to take it to her or she would have to stay inside at recess. I told them that she could stay inside at recess. She didn't forget it again. 

There are so many instances where parents could let natural consequence teach the kids a lesson. We feel pressured by society standards to protect our children every minute of the day; to hover over them to ensure their safety; and as they get older, do their work for them so they get it done. Instead, I challenge you to ask yourself these simple questions 1) what is the natural consequence if my child doesn't heed me? 2) will he/she be safe if the natural consequence happens? If so, let it! 

Here is a few scenarios:

Toddler stage: you tell your child over and over in the store to stay close and he refuses to listen and jets off. You can either run after him to scold him AGAIN or let him get "lost" (where you still have eyes on him) and let him feel a moment of panic when he can't find you. 

School age: you fight with your daughter every night to get her homework done. You can hound her day after day or you can tell her it is her responsibility to get it done and signed by you. If not, let her deal with the responsibility of a bad grade and facing the teacher. 

Teen: your son is a little irresponsible and ends up losing a book borrowed from the teacher. You can either look for it and pay the fine or make your teen figure a way to pay it back or work it off. At this point, they are able to negotiate for themselves. 

Whether you get looked at oddly while your kid explores natural consequences or you have to explain to the school that doing homework isn't your responsibility, keep on letting natural consequences teach. This is one of the best ways for kids to learn what is good ideas or bad ideas and what is good habits or bad habits. We can't save/protect our kids forever and once we teach them that lesson while they're still under the safety of our roofs, the better, sufficient adults they will become. 

"Dear Men" Helpful Valentine Guidelines

Dear Men of America,

The great tradition of Valentine's Day is almost upon us. While you dread the day, most women look forward to it. Don't get me wrong, a lot of women dread the day, but those of us who have somebody special in our life like to think of Valentine's Day as a day where you are reminded to go out of your way and make us feel special. Likewise, it is a day for your women to make you feel special as well. However, since a lot of women don't need help in that department, I write this for you. Including my husband. 

I know my husband thinks not celebrating Valentines Day is a stand against a "commercialized holiday". For our dating relationship and our early marriage, I didn't mind not celebrating it. However, now that I've been a stay at home mom for a while, I look forward to another day that my spouse is reminded that he could do something special for me. So let's talk about do's and don'ts for this special day. This guideline also can be used for anniversaries and birthdays. 

DON'Ts

- Don't drag on about how terrible this day is

We know the day can suck. If we don't get anything out of the day, then we still have to look at Facebook and talk to our friends that week and see how awesome tons of other men are. We are apt to get a bit jealous and resentment will settle in. Remember, we take care of you in the daily grind. If you want us to love our job, remind us why we do it. 

- Don't assume flowers are the right fix

Some women enjoy receiving the same bouquet year after year. A lot of women would hate it. The idea of this holiday is to do something your special somebody would like. Flower's are considered a "safe" gift, but it doesn't mean it's the right gift. Good substitutes could be tea if she loves it. Her favorite chocolate (not the stuff in the heart-shaped boxes). A gift card to her favorite store or restaurant. 

- Don't assume that cost=value of the love we feel

If you buy me $50 in roses, I'm going to be miffed because I can think of a whole lot better of things to do with $50. The same goes for jewelry. Unless she has specified that she is looking for a special piece to add to her collection, skip this (unless your proposing). That money could be used for something heartfelt. 

-Don't buy everyday items

Hint: floor mats, razor blades, vacuums (exceptions: if she has been drooling over a dyson, buy her one), etc. Only buy an "everyday item" if it's been something she has been drooling over and is expensive.

-Don't assume you have to buy a gift or flowers

Experiences are welcomed. Sentiments are sweet. If my husband just plans on childcare and we go on a walk together, I would be thrilled.

-Don't ask your wife 

It's not ok to ask your wife to take care of finding childcare or make reservations for something. We do that constantly and it's nice to know that you want to make the day special for us and that includes doing things that you would normally leave to your spouse. 

- Make the day about sex

This day is not about sex. Period. This is a day about love and being loved, not about strings attached. Also, if you do nothing for the day (no sentiments, etc) don't assume we will put out just because it's Valentine's Day. If we end up having sex at the end of the day, we want to give you a gift in your love language. 

-Give her something that's obviously re-gifted

If somebody gives you a little gift as a friendly Valentine, don't give it to your wife as her gift. The lack of thoughtfulness is not ok. 

DO's

- Plan ahead

There's nothing romantic in a man that picks up something last minute on his way home. We want to know you've thought about us, not that you've stooped to the commercialized expectations. Also, planning ahead means taking care of kid arrangements. 

-Think about experiences

For one of our anniversaries, I set up a date of bungee jumping out of a hot air balloon. It was a really special event and one of the most memorable. Also, I had a friend who once went on a date where the man took her to 4 different places: one for drinks, one for appetizer, one for dinner, one for dessert. She remembers it as one of the best dates she's been on. Go roller skating, mini golfing, laser tag, on a walk, to a indoor water park. Something that's different. 

- Ask a female for help 

If you don't know what we want or expect from you, ask a woman you work with, one of our friends. ANYBODY can have an idea that probably is better than yours if you're lacking direction.

- A nice heartfelt sentiment

Even if it's on a scrap of paper from your kids' homework, a little note of being appreciated and endearments is good. If you need ideas, google the words "sentimental endearments for wife"

- Check out Pintrest

here is the website. www.pinterest.com 

Tons of good ideas. If you're planning ahead you can do inexpensive things that will seem special and unique even if you did steal the idea. Your woman will swoon at things that won't take you much time other than planning ahead. Example: coupons for a day off, a night of doing the dishes, a bubble bath, a dinner date for a night of her choosing. It may be cheesy, but we will think it's sweet, wonderful, and unique. 

-Something different

If you do actually do something for Valentines Day yearly, please don't do the same thing year after year. We will eventually dread the day and wish for change. Again, there is a million things you can do to branch out that will make her feel special. Offer to go shopping with her to buy a few special things for her wardrobe. This will seem especially sweet if you hate to go shopping. 

So, there you go. Follow these rules and you should get some extra love from your woman in return. Also, if you're a single man, buy a package of inexpensive chocolates and give them to a single woman in your workplace or something and you will make her day! Valentines day is torture to a single woman because most dream to have the day where she has somebody special enough to celebrate it with. In the mean time, a friendly valentine is an amazing substitution. 

Sincerely, 

Mandy

Combating the Vegetable Hate

My two older girls have known for a long time why it's important to eat the vegetables in front of them. However, that knowledge wasn't enough for my oldest daughter, Serenity, to be encouraged to eat her vegetables at dinner. The last few weeks we have been doing the dinner battle with Serenity. 

I decided originally that I would revamp some of my meals and make veggies more appealing in the dishes. It didn't work because my kids don't like cooked veggies. So how do you make the dinner salad more appealing? I tried adding interesting things to it but it wasn't enough for her to be encouraged to eat it without complaining. 

I found out how many vegetables they need. For her body weight and height, it seemed a good amount was 1 1/2cups. 

I then thought of a reward she would be excited for. School lunches. Every other Wednesday her school orders pizza from Pizza Hut. She hates not being able to eat pizza with all of her classmates because I'm too cheap. Yes, it's not nutritious either but I know one day twice a month won't kill her. 

So I created this area in our dining room: 

I explained to my older girls they would measure out their own vegetables every night at dinner. I want to empower them to make the choice and it teaches a good life skill in determining portions. Then if dad or I approve that they met the goal for the day, they will earn a tally. After 10 tallies they can earn $2.50 to get school lunch of their choice. Our school only provides lunch on Wednesdays. 

I also set this up on the table:

I am so tired of my daughter coming home every day and the first words out of her mouth is, "What's for dinner?" I could only dream that the first words would be, "Hi mom!" 

Last night I also put a fun spin on tacos. I set their plates up like this: 

I gave them each a bowl so they could measure out the vegetables they wanted on their tacos then I had the meat, rice and cheese in these little individual casserole pots. Each child was easily able to scoop their own ingredients directly onto their tacos. It was nice not to get up every time a child wanted their second taco. 

I plan on using these mini casserole pans to make other dishes in. Any ideas on what else? 

Teach Your Child About the Gifts That Can't be Placed in a Box

Thanksgiving is finally over. It was nice to see people being thankful for what they have in November but the Christmas greediness starts with Black Friday. 

Society is trying to instill in our future generations that while gifts are nice during the Christmas season, the true "gift" is the people behind the gifts and are one of the blessings that we should be grateful for. We are trying to teach them that Christmas wouldn't happen at all if it weren't for Jesus' birth and the importance of His birth. 

However, what do we do at the end of the day that shows these values? People give the kids more stuff; ironically just after celebrating being grateful for the stuff they already have.

This year my kids won't be getting much because of the financial situation we are in. I've saved a few things that I have collected through the year that will be special gifts from Santa, but that will be the extent of our gifts. I've already informed them what their Christmas will look like and why. They shrugged and said, "OK, that's fine" and went back to what they were doing. I've been instilling the phrase, "That gift that _______ gave you would mean nothing compared to the gift of love that _________ gives you-- which is why they gave you the gift."

However, this year is a perfect platform to keep showing those ideals. I'm keeping the Thanksgiving gratitude theme going by continuing with this Christmas one: 

We put up this little tree on our front door and under it are gifts. Each child will label a gift once a day with "gifts" that are given to us every day that could never be placed in a box. These gifts are more precious than any tangible object. 

Here is a photo of our start: 

So I am challenging your family to start your own "special tree" and put the most precious gifts under it that you already have.