The Seatbelt Challenge

A few weeks ago, we got a hole in our tire. The tires barely had the legal tread amount but we were hoping to make it one last season on it. However the tire(s) couldn't be saved so we had to swallow the $520 bill we weren't quite ready for. I told my husband, "I choose to look at this like a blessing. Maybe something would've happened on my trip in July that replacing them will have saved us from the would be heartache or accident." 

Little did I know, I ended up being right. This last Wednesday, as I merged onto the highway headed south, a mustang with the paperwork proclaiming it was a recent purchase got into the left lane so I could pull into the right lane. A half mile down the road, I was nearly even with him in our own respective lanes when he suddenly veared into our lane. I swerved the car to the right just missing slamming into his backseat by the most narrow of increments. I remember swerving, slamming on the breaks and hearing a scream from the backseat.  By the time I came to a complete stop I was almost  turned facing west. My 8 year old daughter behind my seat had screamed in the narrowly missed accident because she was ejected from her booster seat. 

Now before you start victim blaming, know I always visually check to make sure they're buckled in. We are big on car seat safety. So when my daughter buckled in, the clip must not have been fully engaged which led to her being ejected. Stopping from a terrifying 60 mph, I know very well what could have happened. So, I've already implemented some things so this never happens to us again. Like I told my kids, you never know when an accident will happen, so we always need to make sure you're buckled in correctly every time you get in a car.

So here's the challenge and after you complete the challenge, challenge your friends with the hashtag 

#seatbeltchallenge 

The next time you get into the car with your kids take a few extra minutes to go over seat belt safety. It doesn't matter whether they're 5 or 15 years old. We should be going over the basics every 6 months as a reminder. People always get sloppy with the things we do over and over and all the time. 

 Explain and constantly quiz them on what I'm calling the 3-point seatbelt safety. 

1. 

The seatbelt should rest against the hips in case of impact.

2.

Have them pull up on the seat belt after it is buckled in. This assures that the buckle has engaged properly. 

3.

The seatbelt lays across the chest and up across the shoulder.

As part of the challenge, put a reminder where you will see it. I'm later going to put a label on my dashboard so for now, I hung a tag from my rear view mirror. 

Thank you for taking the time to read and hopefully this challenge will be as good for your family as it was mine! After all, we haul around the most precious cargo!

How to Help and be Helped During a Race

How to Help and be Helped During a Race

I have ran one marathon, a lot of half marathons and tons of shorter races. I really love the race experience. I love training and working hard because I keep striving to get that elusive PR. There are races that keep popping up all over the place. I want to tell about my good experience and bad experiences to hopefully pass a long to race directors so they get some feedback. As well, I want to pass along some advice to fellow runners so they may have a better experience. 

Let’s talk about registration: Registration fees have shot up in the last few years. It used to be pretty common to be able to run a marathon (or half) for under $70. Now it seems the average cost is between $100-$130. I don’t mind paying the $115 most cost as long as I’m paying for good amenities and a good course. What really makes my blood boil is that a lot of races are sending out emails within the week after the race has completed asking people to sign up for the following year and the incentive to do so? Every 3 months registration costs will continue to go up. I really do understand that the race directors do this to get people to sign up early. However, I feel it’s a bit too much for the participants. A price increase should not happen earlier than 6 months from race day and late registration should be 60 days prior to race day. Let me finish paying for the first marathon before I have to sign up for next year. This is doubly important for fall races because then you have the holidays right around the corner after you finish the race. Participants shouldn’t have to choose between paying for a race or putting money towards the holiday festivities. I also feel that if spouses are doing a race together and sign up together, maybe a little discount would help ease the cost burden. 

Packet Pick-up: I don’t think we’ve really had a purposefully bad experience. We showed up at our last race to pick up packets and somehow my registration wasn’t there. We were able to get help quickly and straighten it out.  Packet pick-up can equally be just as an important of an affair for some racers as the race itself. It’s nice to have booths that runners can walk around and pick things that may help them along the way. One of my favorite things I’ve seen at packet pick up was at the Boston Marathon. They had a video that showed the course from a biker’s perspective that people could sit down and watch. The video had interviews on it from runners giving course advice or telling their stories. This is great for first timers or out of towners. 

Race Day: For me, I appreciate an early start time for most races. 7:00am seems to be the best time. The later it gets for the warmer month races, the hotter the start time is. When I line up behind the start line, I really like seeing pace markers. That way it encourages people to start where they should be. Nothing is worse than starting where you should and still have to end up weaving around groups of walkers or people that are running twice as slow as you. Walkers, PLEASE START IN THE BACK. We don’t like having to expend extra energy trying to get around you.   Most courses are chip timed now so you’re not getting ahead in any way. For this reason also, I hate out and back courses. My husband, a marathoner, hates having to weave around half marathoners. One race that I did had an out and back course for the full marathoners and shuttled the half marathoners to the marathon halfway point. They had an excellent plan of starting the full marathoners 2 hours before the half marathon so when they dropped off the half marathoners, almost all the full marathoners had already been through the half-way point. 

My biggest pet peeve is chaos at water stations. Most are run by volunteers and not properly given instructions. I really appreciate the volunteers. They are our support team. However, if you choose to volunteer, please realize all my energy is spent on running. I need the volunteer to do some simple things to keep the water stations a pleasant experience. Please don’t set up a water station on the furthest curve of the road. If I have to go several more steps to get to you, I’ll probably just skip the water. Every step and second counts; I don’t want to waste them if I don’t have to. Also, I need volunteers to shout what they have. If I think I grabbed water only to throw back a sports drink, I’m going to be pretty shocked. Most people have preferences to what they want and when we’re running and seeing a volunteer just holding out a cup to us, we have no idea what we’re getting unless you tell us. Runners- when you approach a water station and want to walk, please get your drink and move QUICKLY to the side. A person that wants to chug while running should not have to come to an almost complete stop behind you. Also, to ease the process, every person that uses an aid station should point to whoever they would like to receive a drink from. This eliminates a lot of fumbling and confusion for the volunteers. Also, I really appreciate the workers that know the sign language “water”. I admit it, I’m too exhausted to speak during the second half of a race. If I hold up a W shape with my fingers in front of my mouth, this means “water”. Or if I hold up 2 fingers right before I get to you, that means I need two cups. 

Post race: I really appreciate races that have a good variety of food post race. Candies, fruit, soup, marinated meat on a stick. Wow, some races go all out. It makes me love you that much more. I feel like the amenities make a race go from good to amazing. I really like the races that make the finish line chute a memorable experience. Free post race photos are a neat perk that I’ve seen at some races. 

Other: One thing stands out for me that I remembered from the Washington Newport Marathon this year. They had free childcare in a theatre. I didn’t know they had that until I got there to pick up my packet. If I would’ve known about that, I would have signed up my husband too. However, he wasn’t signed up because he watched the kids so I could run. I was thoroughly impressed with the idea of the childcare though. 

Also, never forget to fill out your personal and medical information on the back of your bib. You never know what’s going to happen in a race. You want to be prepared. 

If you have anything you would like to add, please let me know in the comment section. Thank you to all the people that put on races! 

Whipped Sherbert Punch

I discovered this drink on my 29th birthday. It is a tasty, fruity drink. You may be familiar with the virgin version, but the alcohol version is an enhanced flavor. 

DIRECTIONS:

Mix in a glass 

Equal parts 7up and Hawaiin Fruit Pumch

1 shot Whipped Vodka (I've used Burnetts and Pinnacle) 

1 scoop of rainbow sherbert

Do You Utilize One of the Best Parenting Tools

Dear Parents, 

Do you utilize one of the most useful tools you have? You already possess it and you probably under-utilize it. Natural consequences. 

Natural consequences are such a powerful parenting tool. It teaches kids real life lessons. Now, I'm not saying let your toddler play with a knife and see how it goes. I'm saying if your 4 year old is refusing to put on a coat on a balmy 34 degree day because it's sunny and refuses to listen to your stance, let him/her go out without the coat. The child will quickly realize that maybe mom or dad had a point and be back for the coat. 

My daughter forgot to take her snowsuit one day to school after I told her to pack it that morning. The school called me and asked me to take it to her or she would have to stay inside at recess. I told them that she could stay inside at recess. She didn't forget it again. 

There are so many instances where parents could let natural consequence teach the kids a lesson. We feel pressured by society standards to protect our children every minute of the day; to hover over them to ensure their safety; and as they get older, do their work for them so they get it done. Instead, I challenge you to ask yourself these simple questions 1) what is the natural consequence if my child doesn't heed me? 2) will he/she be safe if the natural consequence happens? If so, let it! 

Here is a few scenarios:

Toddler stage: you tell your child over and over in the store to stay close and he refuses to listen and jets off. You can either run after him to scold him AGAIN or let him get "lost" (where you still have eyes on him) and let him feel a moment of panic when he can't find you. 

School age: you fight with your daughter every night to get her homework done. You can hound her day after day or you can tell her it is her responsibility to get it done and signed by you. If not, let her deal with the responsibility of a bad grade and facing the teacher. 

Teen: your son is a little irresponsible and ends up losing a book borrowed from the teacher. You can either look for it and pay the fine or make your teen figure a way to pay it back or work it off. At this point, they are able to negotiate for themselves. 

Whether you get looked at oddly while your kid explores natural consequences or you have to explain to the school that doing homework isn't your responsibility, keep on letting natural consequences teach. This is one of the best ways for kids to learn what is good ideas or bad ideas and what is good habits or bad habits. We can't save/protect our kids forever and once we teach them that lesson while they're still under the safety of our roofs, the better, sufficient adults they will become. 

"Dear Men" Helpful Valentine Guidelines

Dear Men of America,

The great tradition of Valentine's Day is almost upon us. While you dread the day, most women look forward to it. Don't get me wrong, a lot of women dread the day, but those of us who have somebody special in our life like to think of Valentine's Day as a day where you are reminded to go out of your way and make us feel special. Likewise, it is a day for your women to make you feel special as well. However, since a lot of women don't need help in that department, I write this for you. Including my husband. 

I know my husband thinks not celebrating Valentines Day is a stand against a "commercialized holiday". For our dating relationship and our early marriage, I didn't mind not celebrating it. However, now that I've been a stay at home mom for a while, I look forward to another day that my spouse is reminded that he could do something special for me. So let's talk about do's and don'ts for this special day. This guideline also can be used for anniversaries and birthdays. 

DON'Ts

- Don't drag on about how terrible this day is

We know the day can suck. If we don't get anything out of the day, then we still have to look at Facebook and talk to our friends that week and see how awesome tons of other men are. We are apt to get a bit jealous and resentment will settle in. Remember, we take care of you in the daily grind. If you want us to love our job, remind us why we do it. 

- Don't assume flowers are the right fix

Some women enjoy receiving the same bouquet year after year. A lot of women would hate it. The idea of this holiday is to do something your special somebody would like. Flower's are considered a "safe" gift, but it doesn't mean it's the right gift. Good substitutes could be tea if she loves it. Her favorite chocolate (not the stuff in the heart-shaped boxes). A gift card to her favorite store or restaurant. 

- Don't assume that cost=value of the love we feel

If you buy me $50 in roses, I'm going to be miffed because I can think of a whole lot better of things to do with $50. The same goes for jewelry. Unless she has specified that she is looking for a special piece to add to her collection, skip this (unless your proposing). That money could be used for something heartfelt. 

-Don't buy everyday items

Hint: floor mats, razor blades, vacuums (exceptions: if she has been drooling over a dyson, buy her one), etc. Only buy an "everyday item" if it's been something she has been drooling over and is expensive.

-Don't assume you have to buy a gift or flowers

Experiences are welcomed. Sentiments are sweet. If my husband just plans on childcare and we go on a walk together, I would be thrilled.

-Don't ask your wife 

It's not ok to ask your wife to take care of finding childcare or make reservations for something. We do that constantly and it's nice to know that you want to make the day special for us and that includes doing things that you would normally leave to your spouse. 

- Make the day about sex

This day is not about sex. Period. This is a day about love and being loved, not about strings attached. Also, if you do nothing for the day (no sentiments, etc) don't assume we will put out just because it's Valentine's Day. If we end up having sex at the end of the day, we want to give you a gift in your love language. 

-Give her something that's obviously re-gifted

If somebody gives you a little gift as a friendly Valentine, don't give it to your wife as her gift. The lack of thoughtfulness is not ok. 

DO's

- Plan ahead

There's nothing romantic in a man that picks up something last minute on his way home. We want to know you've thought about us, not that you've stooped to the commercialized expectations. Also, planning ahead means taking care of kid arrangements. 

-Think about experiences

For one of our anniversaries, I set up a date of bungee jumping out of a hot air balloon. It was a really special event and one of the most memorable. Also, I had a friend who once went on a date where the man took her to 4 different places: one for drinks, one for appetizer, one for dinner, one for dessert. She remembers it as one of the best dates she's been on. Go roller skating, mini golfing, laser tag, on a walk, to a indoor water park. Something that's different. 

- Ask a female for help 

If you don't know what we want or expect from you, ask a woman you work with, one of our friends. ANYBODY can have an idea that probably is better than yours if you're lacking direction.

- A nice heartfelt sentiment

Even if it's on a scrap of paper from your kids' homework, a little note of being appreciated and endearments is good. If you need ideas, google the words "sentimental endearments for wife"

- Check out Pintrest

here is the website. www.pinterest.com 

Tons of good ideas. If you're planning ahead you can do inexpensive things that will seem special and unique even if you did steal the idea. Your woman will swoon at things that won't take you much time other than planning ahead. Example: coupons for a day off, a night of doing the dishes, a bubble bath, a dinner date for a night of her choosing. It may be cheesy, but we will think it's sweet, wonderful, and unique. 

-Something different

If you do actually do something for Valentines Day yearly, please don't do the same thing year after year. We will eventually dread the day and wish for change. Again, there is a million things you can do to branch out that will make her feel special. Offer to go shopping with her to buy a few special things for her wardrobe. This will seem especially sweet if you hate to go shopping. 

So, there you go. Follow these rules and you should get some extra love from your woman in return. Also, if you're a single man, buy a package of inexpensive chocolates and give them to a single woman in your workplace or something and you will make her day! Valentines day is torture to a single woman because most dream to have the day where she has somebody special enough to celebrate it with. In the mean time, a friendly valentine is an amazing substitution. 

Sincerely, 

Mandy

Combating the Vegetable Hate

My two older girls have known for a long time why it's important to eat the vegetables in front of them. However, that knowledge wasn't enough for my oldest daughter, Serenity, to be encouraged to eat her vegetables at dinner. The last few weeks we have been doing the dinner battle with Serenity. 

I decided originally that I would revamp some of my meals and make veggies more appealing in the dishes. It didn't work because my kids don't like cooked veggies. So how do you make the dinner salad more appealing? I tried adding interesting things to it but it wasn't enough for her to be encouraged to eat it without complaining. 

I found out how many vegetables they need. For her body weight and height, it seemed a good amount was 1 1/2cups. 

I then thought of a reward she would be excited for. School lunches. Every other Wednesday her school orders pizza from Pizza Hut. She hates not being able to eat pizza with all of her classmates because I'm too cheap. Yes, it's not nutritious either but I know one day twice a month won't kill her. 

So I created this area in our dining room: 

I explained to my older girls they would measure out their own vegetables every night at dinner. I want to empower them to make the choice and it teaches a good life skill in determining portions. Then if dad or I approve that they met the goal for the day, they will earn a tally. After 10 tallies they can earn $2.50 to get school lunch of their choice. Our school only provides lunch on Wednesdays. 

I also set this up on the table:

I am so tired of my daughter coming home every day and the first words out of her mouth is, "What's for dinner?" I could only dream that the first words would be, "Hi mom!" 

Last night I also put a fun spin on tacos. I set their plates up like this: 

I gave them each a bowl so they could measure out the vegetables they wanted on their tacos then I had the meat, rice and cheese in these little individual casserole pots. Each child was easily able to scoop their own ingredients directly onto their tacos. It was nice not to get up every time a child wanted their second taco. 

I plan on using these mini casserole pans to make other dishes in. Any ideas on what else? 

Teach Your Child About the Gifts That Can't be Placed in a Box

Thanksgiving is finally over. It was nice to see people being thankful for what they have in November but the Christmas greediness starts with Black Friday. 

Society is trying to instill in our future generations that while gifts are nice during the Christmas season, the true "gift" is the people behind the gifts and are one of the blessings that we should be grateful for. We are trying to teach them that Christmas wouldn't happen at all if it weren't for Jesus' birth and the importance of His birth. 

However, what do we do at the end of the day that shows these values? People give the kids more stuff; ironically just after celebrating being grateful for the stuff they already have.

This year my kids won't be getting much because of the financial situation we are in. I've saved a few things that I have collected through the year that will be special gifts from Santa, but that will be the extent of our gifts. I've already informed them what their Christmas will look like and why. They shrugged and said, "OK, that's fine" and went back to what they were doing. I've been instilling the phrase, "That gift that _______ gave you would mean nothing compared to the gift of love that _________ gives you-- which is why they gave you the gift."

However, this year is a perfect platform to keep showing those ideals. I'm keeping the Thanksgiving gratitude theme going by continuing with this Christmas one: 

We put up this little tree on our front door and under it are gifts. Each child will label a gift once a day with "gifts" that are given to us every day that could never be placed in a box. These gifts are more precious than any tangible object. 

Here is a photo of our start: 

So I am challenging your family to start your own "special tree" and put the most precious gifts under it that you already have. 

It's not looking good....

I've had a lot on my mind lately. I had an outpatient procedure done a few weeks ago. A simple procedure where they took a camera and looked at some of my insides. Pretty simple. It was something we felt had to be done with the kidney infections I've been getting. Well, we received the bills this last week. They total to over $1,700. This just blows my mind because we have decent health insurance and it was a simple procedure and there were no complications. In fact, the idea was to go in and see what was going on in the plumbing and possibly put a stint in. Well, they got in and found everything to be in tip-top shape. 

Let me back track and explain some things. I know this may seem incoherent but I'm just so upset and stressed about it that I can't even think straight. To preface, I should explain that we have decent health coverage through Joe's work that we pay over $700 a month for. For major operations, we have a deductible ($1,000) plus a 20% copay. When I had 4 major surgeries last summer that included 2 surgeons and a 3 day hospital stay, we ended up paying $3000 out of pocket for. That was tough to swallow but we felt it was pretty legit. Not great, but I had major stuff taken care of. So, when I went in and with the outpatient status, the procedure itself took under an hour and all they ended up doing was sticking a camera up my who-ha (no cuts and stitches!) and now I have to cough up $1700. I just feel outraged. It's not just the fact that it seems like so much compared to what my surgeries were last summer, but we are just hit really hard right now. The few weeks leading up to my surgery I had been out of work, on a 2 week hiatus. Well, after my surgery, I was supposed to be working again. However, at the same time I received the bills, I found out I lost my job. I should mention the loss wasn't through a fault of my own. Anyhow, so now we have this huge bill staring down at us and: 1) I lost my job, 2) we are just making ends meet now by stretching our budget 3) it's the worst time of the year for bills due to Christmas and 4) the extra normal expenses of winter like heating. I've just been racking my brain trying to figure out how we can do this. I'm glad that I've shopped at the thrift stores and clearance racks throughout the year to already have a semblance of Christmas and I can home-make the rest. I've already broken it to my kids that while every Christmas is focused on love and family, this year that's pretty much what it's going to encompass. What I have saved so far up to this point is going to be Santa's gifts. My kids, bless their little hearts, said they were okay with that and seemed to keep in good spirit. 

To get back on track, I'm not writing this to try to get pity. I'm writing about my situation to express that it's frustrating that us "middle-class" Americans that work hard to pay for our health care are still getting a short end of the stick to get mediocre healthcare. And no, I didn't vote for Obama. I'm frustrated that people are free loading while my family suffers because we choose to work hard. I'm feeling enormous guilt that my family is now going to struggle for x-amount of months because I had health problems, which by the way, is still not straightened out. I feel like maybe I made the wrong decision to seek healthcare because it may cost my family heat for our house or food. 

I can only wonder what has happened in the last year to make the hospital bill skyrocket. Obamacare. I've had people tell me that should have only affected our premiums (which it did). However, my hypothesis lies within this thought: hospitals have been know to charge people without insurance less because of "cash payment" versus the "insurance rate list prices" that are negotiated between the hospital and insurance company. However, the amount of people that are going to be insured because of Obamacare could make hospital bills go up because there will be more insurance companies required, by contract, to cover those expenses. 

Right now I'm doing what I can do get through this time. I'm pinching my pennies and praying that there is an opportunity for us to come up with that money. 

Freezer Tips

You've probably seen those tips flying around Pintrest or Facebook of women that freeze dinners, sauces, soups, etc in freezer bags and have them stocked on top of each other nice and tidy. I tried that for awhile. It's great while in the freezer but it seemed to get messy in the preparing stage and definitely in the thawing stage. It never failed that I got some food stuck in the zipper and when it was thawing, the bag opened or leaked and became a mess. 

In my opinion, I came up with a better option. I freeze nearly everything in canning jars or glass jars that food originally came in (like spaghetti sauce). They're reusable and if you're recycling the ones that food was prepackaged in, more brownie points for you! 

What's wonderful about putting sauces and soups in these jars is that you can stick them straight from the freezer into a crockpot filled with water. Turn on low for 6-8 hours or high for 4-6 hours and you can evenly heat the contents.

 Everybody wants a different kind of soup for dinner? No problem. Thawing Alfredo sauce for dinner? It thaws to more of a texture when you originally made it. If you make spaghetti for dinner and only use 1/2 a jar, stick the rest in the freezer and thaw/heat in a water bath when you are ready. 

So put the ziplock bags away and go grab a jar! 

Learning How to Make Ravioli

A few months ago, I bought a pasta maker at a thrift store for under $10. I was stoked at the idea of making homemade pasta. I honestly didn't care too much about noodles because cost wise (and labor) it didn't seem worth it to make it. However, now that I have the machine, I'm seeing how worth it is! 

When I bought the machine, I wanted to make ravioli. That is worth the time and money saved compared to store bought. However, after looking at a lot of instruction online, I feel there's a few things missing when it comes to making the ravioli. 

I found that making the dough in my stand mixer was easiest. When it's done, I put it in a bread bag to sit for an hour and also when I'm working with the dough (Photo A).

When you are ready to go, I take a fist size amount of dough to work with. Then I take my mesh strainer and sift flour onto my work space and into the ravioli tray. Sprinkle it liberally everywhere. It helps so the ravioli doesn't stick in the tray. When you freeze the ravioli, you can dust off excess flour when they're frozen. 

When I first started making pasta, I thought it was silly that you had to roll through 1-6 to make the pasta. Why couldn't you go to a thin setting and be done? Now I know. It's not just about getting the dough thin, it's about getting the dough to be in a nice rectangle shape and to make sure it's floured thoroughly for the finished product. 

So, roll your dough through each setting, folding the dough into thirds in between each set. This is how it should go through each set: 

1. On setting 1, roll your dough through, after its floured enough so it doesn't feel sticky. 

2. Fold into thirds. (Photo B)

3. Rub your fingers over your work surface with your fingers closed and gather flour in between your digits and rub over each side of the dough so that the dough doesn't feel sticky. (Photo C) 

It should resemble photo D. You just want to rub the flour onto the surface of the dough, not into it.

4. Run it through on setting 1 again, running the dough through the opposite way (on the bias).

5. Complete each setting through 5, keeping the dough floured and rectangle. 

To make the ravioli, I highly recommend using a ravioli tray. I found mine at TJ Max. I use Ravioliera- con mattarello- 26cm. (Photo 1)

1. Sift flour onto the tray (Photo 2)

2. Place your first dough that you pressed on the floured tray (Photo 3)

3. At this point, you do not need to press the dough into the tray. If your dough is a bit narrow in some places, you manually stretch it. Fill each "space" with a heaping half teaspoon of filling. (Photo 4)

4. Run another batch of dough through the machine and place over the filling. (Photo 5) 

5. Lightly sift flour over the top dough. (Photo 6)

6. With a rolling pin, gently roll the dough. Gradually increase pressure (so you don't squirt filling out) until the dough gets cut with the tray ridges. 

7. Extra dough can be cut off and used again- just put it In a bag so it doesn't dry out. 

8. Place freezer paper on a metal cookie pan and either flip the ravioli onto it or dig each one out individually. I use a commercial size cookie sheet because it fits my freezer perfectly. 

9. When you have the sheet filled up, place in the freezer for an hour until frozen. Place ravioli into freezer bags. 

I hope this helps a fellow beginning pasta  maker out. It takes quite a bit of practice, so be patient. To fill up this one cookie sheet takes me about an hour to do solo. 

Good Luck! 

Repurposed Shower Caddy

When back to school sales rolled around, I picked up a few of these shower caddies for other useful reasons. They are super inexpensive at Walmart. 

For in the house or in the car, I've put my son's spare clothes into. 

Art Supplies/books-- super handy for in the house or the car. When it's in the car, I place the caddy in between my kids' booster seats and buckle it through the handle with the middle belt buckle.

Bathroom caddy- I have this up on a shelf when not in use and bring it down just for bath time. 

(Not pictured)

- Cleaning supplies

- crafting supplies

- diaper/Wipes for car or home

- snacks/drinks for kids

- Car organizer

Graciously Accepting Help

Yesterday, I had some grocery shopping to do. I got to witness something almost more rare than a random act of kindness. I was able to witness somebody accept the help that was offered graciously and fervently. 

I went to Winco to get some groceries. The trip went fairly well. I got to the checkout line and there was two people ahead of me. There was a woman at the front that, bless her heart, was clutching a baby (4-6mo old) to her chest with one arm and was trying to single-handed bag her groceries. It's not like she had a few groceries. No, she easily had bought over $100 worth. If you're not familiar with Winco, it's a great grocery store that has (more) affordable prices. One of those reasons is because they don't bag your groceries. The cashier will ring up your groceries and send them down the belt and you bag them. If you have a large order, they can ring up the next order and they send that one down an adjacent belt. The idea is to stagger people. Back to my story, since this woman still had to pay and the person behind her had to be rung up, I had enough time to tell my kids to sit still while I went up to the woman holding the baby and asked her if could help her bag her groceries. To my amazement, she graciously accepted my help. We made a great team. I bagged her groceries and with her free hand, she grabbed the full bags and put them into her cart. I was able to get back to my cart and unload it up on the belt in the nick of time. 

Since the purpose of the blog is to acknowledge this woman's graciousness, I also want to look at why people don't accept help.

1) They refuse to acknowledge that there is a problem

For example-- The woman in my situation above could have thought that she didn't need help. She was getting the job done. It may have just taken her awhile. The problem was that eventually, customer's behind her would eventually probably have to stack behind her and also, she really probably needed to be able to meet her baby's needs in some way that was hindered at that moment by the groceries. 

2) Pride

Sometimes people are just too darn proud to accept help. Sometimes this is enduring, and sometimes this is just frustrating for all involved. 

3) They would just rather do it themselves

There can be a certain sense of satisfaction in doing something yourself.

4) The person doesn't care/like the person offering the help

One word: Relatives. Need I say more?

5) They're not ready to receive the help

Sometimes people need to just keep beating their heads until that brick wall until they are ready for the help. 

I would just like to encourage people to not only practice random acts of kindness but also to accept the help that people offer. You may just inspire somebody around you to accept the help that they themselves need. 

Painted Nails

                     A Story

Closing my eyes, I think back to the day that preceded my wedding. The hustle and bustle of trying to make sure everything was perfect for our big day. My mom wanted her baby girl to be happy and pampered for the big day. We went to a salon and sat down next to each other. Placing my hands on the table in front of me, the Asian woman that sat across from me gently lifted my hands and soaked them in a beautiful white porcelain bowl. She cleaned my hands, massaging them with deaft grace, and finish by giving me a lovely French manicure. It was a relaxing way to be pampered- a way I relished frequently in that period of my life.

I took great care for the rest of that day to not disrupt my French manicure. My hands were to look lovely for my big day. 

The day of my wedding dawned, promising to be a brisk day. That day my soft manicured hands were placed by my daddy into the calloused hands that belong to the love of my life. That day and the next few weeks passed by in a magical yet joyful whirl. 

I was officially a married woman. My days were filled being a working wife. We wanted to save money to buy a home. 

Soon, we were surprised and blessed to find out we had a bundle of joy on her way! My days were still spent working. I still made sure I pampered myself regularly. As an expecting woman, I wanted to feel beautiful. My fingernails changed regularly depicting all the wonderful colors that surrounded us. Vibrant. Pastel. Sleek. Earthy.

Before I knew it, our precious baby arrived. My soft supple hands started the new tasks of caring for a baby. I was now a working mom. Life became busier: learning the balance of family, motherhood and work. My normally manicured hands didn't get the attention they were accustomed to. 

I started to gauge the time between mommy pampering excursions by how many chipped places were in my nails. This was when I made time to rejuvenate myself... And my hands.

My, how time has flown by! We have welcomed three more children into the world. I now stay home to take care of our family. My hands have transformed with all the work I do, with all the accomplishments I make. Where my hands were once soft and supple, they are now calloused from my chores and cracked from chemicals, numerous washings, and weather changes. I don't mind. My hands are tools to work hard for and to care for those I love. 

My third daughter came to me today and asked me to paint our nails to match. She is such a princess to the core! My heart leaped at the idea of painting my nails. I couldn't rember the last time I had done that. I had actually maybe thought about it a time or two, but always dismissed the idea. What would be the point? They just get ruined the same day. This though, there was purpose. My daughter wanted her inner princess to shine. And for the first time in a long time, I wanted my inner princess to shine. It was one small thing that would make me feel beautiful. While it lasted anyways.

My daughter and I dusted off the fingernail paint bin and picked out the most beautiful topaz. We spent fifteen minutes layering on the paint, giggling at my lack of practice. It had been so long, I was smearing the paint over my cuticles and skin that surrounded my nail. Laughing made it worse, but it was still fun. 

I had made my daughter's day by doing something simply out of the ordinary. After my nails dried, I carefully set out to do my chores. I grabbed objects with delicate grace that had not been used in years, trying to preserve my lacquered nails. 

At the end of the day, I was relieved to soak my tired body in a well deserved bath. I reached for my body wash and laughed softly when I discovered my freshly manicured hands did not survive the day. Each fingernail was abused and was missing parts of the beautiful topaz that had coated it just hours before. Each chipped nail has a story of an unselfish act of love and charity. 

I know that I will put it on my to do list to get fingernail polish remover and remove the remainder of the color. Or I might let it continue to chip, one loving gesture at a time, serving as a reminder for me that it only takes a few moments of my time to make my child's day. 

Family Perception

Today I met up with my sister. She has baby number two on the way. We went to a fast food joint to have some lunch. We were quite surprised when we ran into one of our parent's friend, Rick.

I introduced him to Aviana and Rowen and explained that my two older kids were in school. In that instance, it seems time slows down and I can visualize every thought and facial expression that passes his face:

"That's a lot of kids"

"Why so many!?"

"I could never of had that many kids"

"I'm glad I don't have that many grand kids"

Time catches up and he states, "well, your parents sure won the most grand kids contest!"

I just think the perception of my family is hilarious. For example, when I'm out shopping while the older two kids are at school, I have Aviana and Rowen with me. People have stopped me and said, "You have the most perfect family! One boy and one girl!" I reply, "It's even more perfect because they have two big sisters in school." People's expressions go from content to bewilderment to pity in a heartbeat. Suddenly, it seems I sprout horns and they quickly exclaim, "Well, you are a busy lady!" Or "You must've kept going until you got that boy!" Then they rush away feeling sorry for me. 

I come from a family of just my sister and I. My husband was the third (surprise!) child. However, my husband's dad is the oldest out of ten. My mother in law has a sister that had ten children. Our 4 seems comfortable. Not too many at all. However, the way people perceive us is as if we had 20! 

We are so glad we had 4. Not so we could have a boy, but because we felt like that was God's path. Our van is full and so is our hearts. 

I've had it... FTM

So I'm putting it out there that sometimes I'm a bit ignorant of text slang because we don't text much and refuse to pay for it. 

Just a forewarning, I'm not singling any of my friends out, I've just seen this tons and it made me think. Yes, this is a pretty unimportant post, but it was on my mind.  Anyhow, read on...

I've seen a lot of FML on Facebook. I had a good idea what it meant, mostly by context. So tonight I researched it and confirmed it means FUCK MY LIFE. I find that so historical because most of the people that use it have pretty good lives and would probably agree. 

Tonight I got in a disagreement with my husband and "FML" flashed through my mind. Really though, that wasn't appropriate for the situation. I love my husband and I would not trade shoes with anybody. So I was thinking, there has got to be a better abbreviation for things like that. So, how bout we switch to:

 FTM (FUCK THIS MOMENT) 

HTM (HATE THIS MOMENT)

ICS... (I COULD STRANGLE...)

Doesn't that just sound so much better? Just think about how much more positive we could all sound by telling the world we don't hate our life, just the moment are in. 

Happy texting!

I Work Hard, Where's the Body You Promised?

When I originally started this blog, I wanted to be real. Write about real issues that women face. For the most part, I haven't. I've been too scared about what my close friends and family would say. However, I think this message needs to be read and I am willing to bare it all to get this message out there.

A few days ago, a fitness photo went viral of a smoking hot mama (probably weighing 90 pounds) kneeling behind her three young kids. I thought it was great and inspirational until I read the message: "What's your excuse?" This for me was the straw that broke the camel's back. Every time I scroll down my news feed, there is these weight loss ads that depict fit sexy, skinny women. All of these ads (and a lot of other "inspirational" stuff floating around out there) are telling me that if I work hard enough, I can have that lean, sexy, skinny body. 

And I want that so bad.

Like a lot of women, my body is my biggest insecurity. Just a quick note: this has nothing to do whether I'm glad I used my body to have kids or not. I would never trade a great body for my kids. This is about me disliking the way my body looks. I like my legs and arms for the most part. My biggest areas of contempt are breasts that are disproportionate to my stomach size. Shirts fit terribly. My upper body frame is a size small and my stomach is a size medium. Also, pants don't fit that well. I should wear a size 6 but it's too tight around my tummy (but fits my waist) or it gives me the dreaded muffin top look. So, where I'm at is a size 8 and they are constantly falling down because they are too big. 

I've worked hard for that size. Guess what? I don't look a thing like those women in the ads and no, there's no medical reasons preventing from my stomach shrinking more. The number on the scale shows I've done amazing things in the last few years. So let's talk about how I've gotten to this point and the "excuses" that I face. 

If you haven't read my blog before, let me give you a rundown of what my life has looked like in the past 8 years so we can get a good handle on my situation and what lead to this blog.

I'm 28 years old, 5' 7", a wife, a stay at home mother of 4 children (ages 8-3), a non-certified personal trainer, a great cook, and a runner. These are some of the most most important things that describe me. My daily life is filled with buckets after buckets of laundry, sink full after sink full of dishes, dirty toilets, baths, vacuuming, food prepping and storage for future use, cooking the daily meals, getting 2 kids to and from school, running after and taking care of 2 kids at home, naps, toddler school time, training my student, working out, and when all is said and done-- more laundry with a side of laundry…. Yes, my days are packed and I normally can't wait to just collapse at the end of my days. 

I had my oldest daughter in 2005 and seemed to have a normal pregnancy and delivery. After she was born, I had pelvic problems that were finally diagnosed after my second daughter was born in 2007. I have a separated pubis symphasis. If you would like to read more on this daily struggle that I live with, read this: http://marekmama.blogspot.com/2012/09/how-i-live-with-separated-pubis.html . In short, my pelvic bone hurts a lot. All the time. Fast forward to surviving through 2 more planned pregnancies. After all pregnancies were said and done, I walked out of the hospital after my last child was born  in 2010 weighing 200 pounds. After I was done breastfeeding (I had milk issues that I didn't want to complicate further by working out), I decided to lose all the weight. I lost all the weight at home doing DVDs, running outside or on the treadmill, and doing weights. Mind you, I did all of this with a really bad pelvis. I used lots of Tylenol and Ibuprofen in this time span to accomplish these goals. That year, I also had two steroid shots injected into my pelvis to help manage pain. By 2012, I got down to 150 pounds. I thought this was a really good weight. I was still really unhappy with my body shape. I tried not to focus on it because I was eating 1200-1600 calories and I worked out a lot. In 2012 I ran 2 half marathons and ran several shorter distance races. I trained like a beast. However, during last year (2012), I ended up having 4 major surgeries (partial hysterectomy, bladder repair, hernia repair, removed gallbladder) in one shot, eight weeks before the Portland Half Marathon. After 6 weeks of intensive recovery, I got the clearance to run again. I had two weeks of training under my belt and completed the Portland Half Marathon in 2 hours 8 minutes. Not shabby for all the obstacles I had faced that year. 

So, that brings us to this year. I've also done a lot of training this year. I wanted to do even better than I did last year. So far, my app on my iPhone shows that I've ran 554.52 miles burning a total of 65, 970 calories (as of mid October 2013). Just keep in mind, this does not include all my unrecorded runs and also does not include all of my strength/cardio training I do. I ran several shorter distance races and completed 4 half marathons this year. My big struggles this year has been two kidney infections. One right before the spring races and one recently right before the fall races. Those were huge set backs. I'm still in the process of figuring out why I'm getting them.  I was pleased that I got down to 140 pounds by still keeping my diet under check. Now, I'm not saying I don't splurge on the food because I do. 

I'm actually a food addict. I struggle with the food a little. I do well when I am in my own home. In fact, I cook wonderful food which can be seen in some of the recipes I've blogged. My problem is when I'm not home. I have the idea that if I'm going to break my routine, I might as well do it big and be satisfied in my choice. This doesn't happen that often because I'm a stay at home mom. I stay at home a lot so don't think I'm out stuffing my face because I have my food addiction well in hand. 

By this point, I hope I'm painting a picture of a busy stay at home mom that even though has a million reasons- not excuses- that the time being spent on myself to maintain my body could be better spent doing things for my family. I also have plenty of medical reasons that would excuse me from putting in the work. 

So, are you ready for the kicker?

After putting in the sweat and tears to get to the "lean" healthy 140 pounds, I dislike my body. I have a muffin top that will not go away. I've got amazing rock hard abs under that flab. When I was at 150 pounds and thought, if I can lose some more, the flab will dissipate. It didn't. My boobs shrank more, but that belly skin has gone nowhere. No matter how little I eat, no matter how much I work out- it's going nowhere. The only thing that's going to make that go away is a knife or some serious photo shop work. 

No Photo editing in this photo!

By now you may be thinking, "If she does all that work and she looks like that, how come she isn't happy?" Well, remember all those photos and inspirational messages that tell me that if I put the excuses behind me and work hard, I can be lean and sexy? I did the work- how come I didn't receive the damn product?!? 

I'm done with all of those messages. Here's a message that should be shared louder: A healthy BMI, hard work and personal goals is healthy. That is what you should try to obtain. That is the message that should be spread. 

Epic Cooking day = Epic Mess

Today was one of those epic cooking days. As I'm sitting here tonight, I can't help but be a bit disappointed. In all my success today was a lot of failure too. Don't worry, I'm not down on myself, I just wish there was another Mandy to help. "Hey! Quit dawdling and pick up all that junk on the floor. Then go rotate everybody's summer/winter clothes! Then when you're done with that, the toilet is STILL smelling pretty funky."

This morning I decided I was going to get shit done! By that, I mean I was going to get a lot of the cooking done I've had on my to-do list. Don't get me wrong, I've done a lot of cooking lately. A lot of preserving. I've made 4 batches of homemade spaghetti sauce so far this fall among other things. 

Yesterday, I went out and bought 10 pounds of bananas. Sounds like my family's going to be backed up for a while, right? Nah, my husband offered for payment to my kids' Taekwondo teacher (his Krav Maga instructor) my awesome cooking skills as payment for the classes. So, not only is my family flying through my awesome banana bread, so is the teacher. 

While I am thrilled (in most moments) we can have an awesome exchange, I cursed all day that I only have 2 bread loaf pans. My oven could fit four, but unfortunately I only have two.  We're not spending any extra money right now, which means I have to do things the hard way sometimes. So that means I am left with making a batch, waiting an hour, wash all baking/mixing bowls, and then doing it again. And then again. And then again. I washed that stupid mixing bowl 6 times today. Along with all the other stuff. 

Victory at the end! I get it all done, make a killer dinner from scratch, complete with my homemade sweet dinner rolls and I see that clean mixing bowl staring at me. 

I swear it spoke to me, "You know, Mandy, you bought that pasta roller from the thrift store over there. Then you bought the semolina flour. You have time. Make some pasta. If you make enough, you can even try it with the dinner you're waiting on tonight. C'mon you know you want to get it done. You could cross off one more thing on your to-do list." 

So I whip it out. And wouldn't you know that was the moment when all the kids had to descend on me and bug the crap out of me? I call my person a two-butt kitchen. That's because only two butts fit! And I had my big butt and four little ones in there! 

We got a good start to it and I got quite a bit of pasta in the dehydrator.   I'm very excited to pair it with my homemade Alfredo sauce. Yum!

At this point your probably wondering why I still see any disappointment in my day. Well, I see tons of failures. My kitchen is a disaster, even though the dishwasher is ready to be unloaded in the morning. I failed in folding the 4 loads of clean laundry sitting downstairs. I failed to get the rest of the laundry downstairs, sorted, and started on. I failed in even remotely keeping up on the rest of the house today. All the kids seem to do an amazing job of just moving crap from a random spot in the house to another random spot. Today was no exception. My kids were also lovely enough to add any leftover food onto the floor they deemed not good enough to make it into their mouth . 

I would feel great about all the things I achieved today if not for all the things that keep piling up on top of the already-there messes.

Oh, by the way, did I mention I also made a batch of crockpot applesauce today???

My messy kitchen that will be the first thing I tackle in the morning. You can bet my family is eating cereal tomorrow!

Baking Products

These following products are ones that make my dishes so yummy. :)

Chia seeds are great to bake with! Find in a health food store or in the bulk section at a store such as Winco. I've also seen them at Costco.

If you have to bake with shortening, this is the way to go! It's a bit more expensive but well worth it! I buy it at Yokes or Fred Meyers (in the natural section)

Any flour by this brand is great! It's non-GMO/all natural! It can be locally found at Yokes for almost $8-9/bag but I found it at Walmart for under 1/2 that! 

Once I switched to organic sugar, my life changed. Refined sugar makes me so gassy! I use this for everything! This is found at Costco.

Banana Bread Variations

I've been buying bananas lately and my family is letting them go bad on purpose so I have to make banana bread. You'll see in my recipes, we like to use Chia seeds because they're rich in Omega 3 and also because they keep us hydrated (Google that if you don't understand). 

               This is the Banana Cocunut

Here are my recipes:

Banana Bread

Basic Recipe (Betty Crocker)

1 1/4c sugar

1/2c butter, softened

2 large eggs

1 1/2c mashed bananas (3 medium)

1/2c buttermilk*

1 teaspoon vanilla

2 1/2c all purpose flour

1 teaspoon baking soda

1 teaspoon salt

* I substitute buttermilk with milk mixed with 1 teaspoon white vinegar (if I don't have buttermilk on hand) OR replace with equal parts orange juice.

1. Move oven rack to lowest position. Heat oven to 350 degrees. Grease bottoms of 2 loaf pans.

2. Mix all ingredients, mixing in flour last. Beat until smooth. 

3. Divide batter between two pans and bake. 60-75 minutes or until toothpick comes out clean.

4. Cool on wire rack. Enjoy or wrap up and freeze.

Variations: 

Banana Almond Bread

>this makes a wonderful breakfast. Smear a little PB on the top and serve with yogurt. 

Make as above. At the end of mixing stage add in 

-1 large handful of slivered almonds

-1c chocolate chips

-heaping  1/2 c. Chia seeds

Banana Coconut Bread

>this is great anytime but it makes a great dessert bread. 

Make as above, EXCEPT reduce sugar to 1 cup and use buttermilk for the liquid (you don't want this one drying out!). At the end of mixing stage add in 

- 3/4c shredded coconut 

- 3/4c white chocolate chips

- heaping 1/2c Chia seeds

I hope you enjoy these. My family just devours it!

*also check out the post of Baking Products*